A friend with a newborn was agonizing over her return to work. Her workplace is willing to be very flexible with her and the benefits she gets, even returning part time, are really excellent. Just the same, at 5 weeks, her baby will make working difficult. Her conscience will make working almost impossible. As we discussed this, my heart pined for her.
When I stopped working, I felt a strange sense of absence. When you work for as long as you can remember, then stop, there is an empty feeling - What do I do? Why aren't I busy? What is my purpose? How will spend my time? etc. THEN you have a baby and all those questions are answered with one little heartbeat.
Even as workplaces struggle to be family friendly and extend benefits to men for paternity leave and women for extended maternity leave, there is the sense that the "full time" mothers (I try not to use the term "stay-at-home-mom" because we aren't home a lot) aren't utilizing their full potential.
The stigma, less now that in previous generations, is an oddity because every working mother that I have talked to says "Wow, I wish I could do that for my kids..." Come to find out, it is good for moms, too! The men I talk to express that their wives staying at home was one of the best decisions made for their families.
What is it, in our culture, generation, professional gathering that makes this such a difficult gig?
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